Friday, May 2, 2008

The hardest thing...

8:37 AM

Hello Loves,

The hardest thing for me to learn is to have an idea or believe something that nobody else agrees with and stand alone. I have this giant desire to fit in, to have connections with people, that I will sometimes belittle or hide the belief or idea.

I really want to be able to disagree with everyone and still feel complete, not needing reassurence from other people.

I'm always in the closet about something. Yes, everybody may know that I believe one thing or another, but having an in-depth conversation with someone I don't know very well and be able to hold my own is nearly impossible. For the most part I keep my ideas and beliefs to myself due to fear.

I don't want to becom extreme and end up closed minded, thinking my way is the only way. I'm a very open person. I almost pride myself on it. I have that skill down pack. Dealing with this issue, it is unlikely that I will lose my willingness to be open. Although being open is a good characteristic to have, I may be too open.

When it boils down, it is about being comfortable in my own skin. Another issue I'm still dealing with. Knowing that I'm not stupid for saying this or that and that I'm completely fine the way I am with all my beliefs, thoughts, and ideas.

What is the hardest thing for you to learn?

Love,
LeiraViolet

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